Honestly? My emotions were all over the place last week. Felt like I was riding a rollercoaster I never bought a ticket for. Snapped at my partner over dirty dishes, felt super anxious about work for no clear reason, just… bleh. Saw this thing about an “Emotion Regulation Checklist” online – not some fancy therapy, just quick tips – and figured, why not try it? Anything’s gotta be better than feeling stuck like this.
Grabbing the Tools
First things first. I needed to actually make this checklist. Didn’t overthink it. Grabbed:
- A regular lined notebook (the one I use for grocery lists sometimes).
- A blue pen. Red felt too angry, black too boring. Blue it was.
- My phone timer. Because apparently I need alarms for everything.
Step 1: The Body Check-In
When I felt that familiar tightness in my chest after a work call (you know, the useless one that just eats time?), I paused. Seriously, just stopped staring at the screen. Closed my eyes for like 30 seconds. Paid attention. Jaw? Clenched. Shoulders? Up near my ears. Stomach? Knots. First Tip: Notice the physical stuff. It wasn’t just “stress” – it was right there in my muscles. Kinda obvious once I looked.
Step 2: Name That Beast!
Okay, what was I feeling? Tried to be specific. Not just “bad.” Was it frustration because the meeting went nowhere? Worry that I’d miss a deadline because of it? Or maybe resentment for having my time wasted? Ding ding ding! Resentment felt closest. Second Tip: Pin down the exact emotion. Harder than it sounds, honestly. Took a couple tries.
Step 3: The “Why” Part (Not Always Easy)
Tried to figure out why the resentment hit so hard. Was it just this meeting? Or was it pattern? Yeah… it was. This was the third time this week the same thing happened with the same team. Third Tip: Ask “What triggered this?” Sometimes the answer is fuzzy, but this time it clicked – it wasn’t just one thing, it was the repeated waste of time.
Step 4: Quick Fix Attempts
Time for those “quick tips” I scribbled down earlier:
- Breathe, dummy! Seriously. Did four slow breaths: deep in through the nose, out slowly through the mouth. Felt cheesy, but helped my shoulders drop a tiny bit.
- Challenge the thought: My brain was screaming “They never respect your time!” But I asked: Is that completely, 100% true? Well… probably not everyone. Mostly just one chaotic team member.
- Shake it off (literally): Stood up and shook out my arms and legs like a wet dog for maybe 10 seconds. Felt silly. Also kinda worked.
The breathing helped most instantly. The thought challenge felt useful for perspective.
Step 5: What’s Underneath?
The tip said look for the deeper need. Okay, what did I need in that frustrating moment? Realized I just wanted some control over my own schedule and to feel like my time mattered. The chaos stole that. Aha moment.
Step 6: Tiny Action Step
Couldn’t fix the whole team, obviously. But I could control my next step. Sent a simple Slack message: “Hey, for future meetings, can we agree to include a quick agenda bullet point in the invite? Helps us stay on track!” Small thing. Took maybe 30 seconds. Felt proactive.
Reflecting on the Checklist Mess
Did this solve world peace? Nope. But going through these steps, scribbling notes in my cheap notebook? It stopped the spiral. Instead of stewing for an hour or snapping at someone later, it took maybe 5-7 minutes total. The physical check-in and simple breathing were the easiest wins for immediate calm. Naming the emotion and finding the underlying need? That felt useful long-term – like spotting patterns before they drown me.
Will I remember to pull out the checklist every single time I wanna throw a fit? Probably not. My head’s too chaotic for that. But now I know a few of the quick tricks (breathing! shaking it out!) actually work when I remember them. And just knowing I can slow down and untangle the mess? That’s something. Baby steps, right? Gonna keep the ugly blue-ink checklist taped inside my notebook lid. Just in case the rollercoaster cranks up again tomorrow.