In our lives, sometimes strange things happen. For example:
A mosquito bite hurts so much, but a fall doesn’t seem like much of an injury.
Or, we are happy with small improvements, but when we have achieved great success, even more effort seems meaningless.
These phenomena seem contradictory, but there is an interesting psychological principle behind them called “Weber’s Law.” Today, we will discuss what this law is and how it affects our daily lives.
What is Weber’s Law?
Simply put, Weber’s Law states that when a person experiences a relatively strong stimulus, they will find weaker stimuli less noticeable or less important.
Let’s take an example to illustrate this point:
If you just moved into a new house, you would feel that it was very clean and comfortable for the first few days. But after a while, you might not feel that it was so new anymore, and you might even start complaining that the floor wasn’t shiny enough or the wallpaper wasn’t pretty enough.
This is because your brain has become accustomed to this environment, so new changes are less likely to catch your attention.
Another example is when you walk out of a noisy subway station and into a quiet coffee shop. At first, you will find it very quiet. But after a while, you will slowly get used to it, and the feeling of “sudden silence” will disappear.
How is this law reflected in our daily lives?
1. Why do we “get used” to certain things?
Have you ever noticed that some things make you happy at first, but after a while you take them for granted?
For example:
- Your family cooks for you every day, and at first you think they are so nice.
- But later you think it’s only natural and don’t thank them anymore.
- Or, a friend gives you a gift for the first time, and you are very touched.
- But if they give you things often, you gradually think it’s no big deal.
This is because our brains have an “adaptation mechanism,” which means that we gradually get used to repeated stimuli. Once we get used to something, we no longer feel as strongly about it as we did at first.
That’s why you’ll find that a lot of happiness and satisfaction are “short-lived,” and it’s not easy to stay happy all the time.
2. The higher your expectations, the greater your disappointment?
Weber’s Law also tells us that our expectations affect our emotional responses.
For example:
- If you participate in a competition with the goal of winning first place;
- But you only come in third, you may feel disappointed;
- But if your goal was just to “participate,” even if you only win a consolation prize, you will still feel happy.
This shows that it is not the result itself that determines our mood, but our original expectations.
In other words, if you have high expectations for something, even if the result is not bad, you may still feel dissatisfied; but if your expectations are low, even if you gain very little, you will still feel quite satisfied.
Therefore, if you want to be happier, you may try to lower your expectations a little.
3. The brain likes to be lazy and doesn’t want to reevaluate things
The human brain is actually quite lazy. It likes to take the “old road.”
What does this mean? It means that we often use past experiences to judge current events, rather than rethinking them each time.
For example:
- Suppose you used to buy a bottle of water for $2.
- Now the same water sells for $5, and you might think it’s expensive.
- But if you used to drink bottled mineral water that cost ten dollars each;
- Then seeing a bottle of water for five dollars might still seem like a good deal to you.
In other words, our judgments about things are often not based on absolute values, but on relative changes.
This is a psychological trick that businesses often use. They raise the price first, then offer a discount, making you think, “Wow, this discount is a great deal!” In reality, the final price may be about the same as before, or even more expensive.
What can we learn from this?
1. Don’t just look at the surface; learn to ask yourself “why” a few more times
A lot of times, we rush into buying something because we see words like “price drop,” “discount,” or “limited-time offer.” But in reality, these messages might be “psychological traps” carefully designed by businesses.
For example:
- Businesses raise the price of a product first;
- Then they offer a “50% discount,” making you feel like you’re getting a good deal;
- But in reality, the price hasn’t gone down by much.
At this point, we need to learn to stay calm and not be fooled by appearances. We can check the historical prices or compare prices on other platforms to avoid being deceived.
Whether it’s buying something or making a decision, we should ask ourselves: “Do I really need this?” “Is it really better than others?” “Am I being swayed by my emotions?”
2. Break big goals into smaller tasks to make them easier to stick to
Many people like to set very high goals, such as “I want to lose 10 pounds in a month” or “I want to learn three languages in a year.”
But the reality is that big goals are often too daunting and can easily lead to giving up halfway.
This is where Weber’s Law comes in handy: Instead of trying to achieve a huge goal all at once, break it down into smaller steps and take it one step at a time.
For example, if you want to lose weight:
- Don’t start by thinking about losing ten pounds.
- Set a small goal first, such as “exercise three times a week.”
- Or “eat one less takeout meal a day.”
- Give yourself a small reward for each small goal you achieve;
- This will make you feel more accomplished and make it easier to stick with it.
It’s like running a marathon. If you stare at the finish line, it will seem unattainable, but if you divide the entire process into several segments and treat each segment as a new starting point, it will be much easier.
3. Learn to be grateful and don’t overlook the little joys in life
We tend to take for granted the people who are good to us, especially our family and friends.
For example:
- Your parents cook and do your laundry every day.
- You may have gotten used to it and even think they are “too controlling.”
- Your friends are always there when you need help.
- But you may think that’s “what they should do.”
But in fact, these seemingly “ordinary” things are what we should truly cherish.
Weber’s Law tells us that once you get used to someone’s kindness, you tend to overlook their efforts.
Therefore, we should remind ourselves from time to time:
“This person is so good to me, have I responded properly?”
“Am I taking other people’s kindness for granted?”
You can try doing the following:
- Record one small thing that warms your heart every day;
- Send a message of gratitude to someone who cares about you;
- Or just say “thank you,” even if it’s just a smile.
These small gestures will not only make you happier, but also let others feel your kindness.
Summary: What we can learn from Weber’s law
- Our response to stimuli is relative, not absolute.
- The same change can feel different in different contexts.
- Expectations affect our emotional experiences.
- The higher the expectations, the easier it is to be disappointed; reasonable expectations make it easier to feel satisfied.
- The brain likes to rely on experience and doesn’t like to think.
- So we need to learn to think outside the box and look at problems in a new way.
- Happiness can be trained.
- Through gratitude, recording the good things in life, and adjusting our goals, we can become happier.
Final thoughts
Although Weber’s law sounds like a psychological term, it is actually all around us, constantly influencing our feelings and behavior.
Next time you feel bored, irritable, or lose interest in certain people or things, stop and think:
- Are my expectations too high?
- Have I become so accustomed to its presence that I no longer appreciate it?
- Have I overlooked those who have been quietly supporting me all along?
There are many small details in life that may seem insignificant, but they make up the happiness of each day.
May you continue to feel the warmth of these small yet meaningful moments even in the midst of a busy life.